Woke up grey.

Somehow I dropped the ball. I woke up and things were back to being grey, inside my head.

I'm really tired and worn. Heckofalot to do, as I've written so many times before. School, work and traveling inbetween nets me 60 hour weeks.

It's really tough to sit down and work on the school bits as the project feels so extremly braindead. And the course material to take in is just so massive. And I don't know where they'll put the bar on the exam. I could be underdoing it, or I could be overdoing it. But I'll have one, one and a half week to read through it all a second time.

I'm loved at work. I'm the guy who's always there. I'm the helpful one the other teachers turn to when things fuck up. I have the most popular courses. And then, I run into little eightyearold girls who spend their entire lessons trying to think of the most hurtful things they can say. And, I really can't do much about it. And I've already caught myself decending into pettyness and vindictivness when they do that. Next week, make the rules clear again. And if they missbehave, they'll get to leave. Damn it's just awful and painful to have those courses.